How to comfort someone who is stressed over text

Download Article Co-authored by Jessica George, MA, CHt and Madeleine Flamiano Last Updated: February 18, 2022 References

How to comfort someone who is stressed over text

Download Article   Co-authored by Jessica George, MA, CHt and Madeleine Flamiano

Last Updated: February 18, 2022 References

Download Article X

This article was co-authored by Jessica George, MA, CHt and by wikiHow staff writer, Madeleine Flamiano. Jessica George is a Marriage and Family Therapist, Certified Professional Master Life Coach, and Co-Founder of Evolve Therapy Coaching based in Glendale, California. With more than 20 years of experience, she specializes in hybrid therapy and coaching services, couples counseling, and clinical hypnotherapy. Jessica holds a Bachelors degree from The University of California, Santa Barbara and an MA in Counseling Psychology and Talk Therapy from Ryokan College. Jessica is trained in the Imago technique and the Gottman method for couples therapy. She also earned a Professional Life-Coach Certification from The Fowler Academy and an Infinite Possibilities Relationship Certification. She is a member of the International Board of Coaches and Practitioners (IBCP).

There are 14 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.

This article has been viewed 6,472 times.

Everyone experiences some anxiety at one point in their lives. When a person you care about feels overwhelmed, you want to make their day better. Luckily, a kind text goes a long way. Whether anyone you know is going through a really stressful time or lives with anxiety, well share some thoughtful messages that show you care. Read on for tips on how to comfort people over text so they know you're always there for them.

Steps

1 1 of 12:"You are always loved."

Unconditional affection tells a person that you fully embrace them. Remind them that they have nothing to hide. Appreciate every part of them and reassure them that the anxiety they experience is valid. Celebrate their uniqueness and praise their strengths. Show acceptance for their mental health journey by saying youll be there for the good days and the bad ones.[1] X Research source Go to source

  • "Your anxiety doesnt change how I feel about you. Its just part of who you are."
  • "Youre still the fun, outgoing, and creative partner I fell in love with. I cherish you."
  • "I adore your mind. I always want to know whats on it."

2 2 of 12:"That sounds so rough."

Acknowledge difficult emotions to make them feel heard.[2] X Expert Source

Jessica George, MA, CHt
Certified Professional Master Life Coach Expert Interview.  11 February 2022. Go to source  You can show active listening even when you text. Invite them to go into full details about their anxiety and mental health struggles. Respond directly to all of their challenges and frustrations. Talk about how youd feel in their same situation. Your empathy proves youre an ally and that you consider their feelings important.[3] X Research source Go to source

  • "Youre right. Deadlines are really stressful. Youve got so much on your plate."
  • "I would be really hurt if someone said that to me, too. It makes sense to feel nervous seeing them again."
  • "I can tell that this has been a really challenging day for you. Can you tell me more about it?"

3 3 of 12:"Youre safe. Ive got you."

Be reassuring and protective to relieve their fears and stresses. Offer a safe space in your text conversations where they are complimented and comforted. Focus on how youre hopeful for their future. Tell them that youre proud of them. Above all, fight any of their self-doubts by telling them you wont go away.[4] X Research source Go to source

  • "You can tell me anything. I wont judge you."[5] X Expert Source

Jessica George, MA, CHt
Certified Professional Master Life Coach Expert Interview.  11 February 2022. Go to source

  • "Its okay to feel unsure. I believe in you, though."
  • "I know youre going to be successful. Im always your #1 fan."

4 4 of 12:"Whats at the root of this?"

Ask about the problem theyre facing so you can slow down and unpack it.[6] X Expert Source

Jessica George, MA, CHt
Certified Professional Master Life Coach Expert Interview.  11 February 2022. Go to source  Make a list of any obstacles adding to their stress levels. Talk about the kind of problem thats coming up for them right now. Is it related to work, family, friendships, health, or housing? Outline a big goal together. Talk about how theyll feel when they resolve any conflict theyre up against.[7] X Research source Go to source

  • "When did you start feeling nervous? Is it when you ran into your ex?"
  • "Didnt you just get off the phone with your mom? Do you feel a lot of pressure right now?"
  • "You just paid your utility bills, right? How are you feeling about your monthly budget?"
  • When people can make a direct correlation to the cause of their anxiety, it somehow begins to dissipate.[8] X Expert Source

Jessica George, MA, CHt
Certified Professional Master Life Coach Expert Interview.  11 February 2022. Go to source

5 5 of 12:"How can I help?"

Offer solutions and split up tasks to help manage their anxiety. Ask them what kind of support feels the best to them. Do they just want a hug, or would they like you to review mental health resources with them? If a problem feels too big for them, check in and see if theyd like you to break it down for them. Talk about steps they can take one at a time.[9] X Trustworthy Source Greater Good Magazine Journal published by UC Berkeley's Greater Good Science Center, which uses scientific research to promote happier living Go to source

  • "Do you like to-do lists? Should we write one right now?"
  • "What feels better? Talking it out or just sharing some fun memes?"
  • "Would it help to look into some local therapists later this weekend?"

6 6 of 12:"Take a deep breath."

Guide them to take a pause and decompress with grounding exercises. Help them clear their head and talk about calming activities. Ask what small rituals distract them or make them feel balanced. Do they like to get their body moving or do they prefer stillness? Maybe they love a certain candle scent or a bubble bath relieves their anxiety. Learn about what makes them happy or content.[10] X Research source Go to source

  • "Lets both inhale and exhale. 10 times, okay? How are you feeling now?"
  • "Why dont you light that vanilla candle we got at the mall? You said it was your favorite."
  • "Hey, its still super bright out. Its really nice out there where you live. Why dont you go on a short walk and catch some vitamin D?"

7 7 of 12:"I think we could both use a break."

Point out that everyone needs to unwind to help them relate with you. Share when youve been busy or overwhelmed, then invite them to some activities where you both can relax or have fun. By chatting about both emotional challenges and the benefits of fun breaks, you let them one know that its perfectly okay to hit a limit and step away from work or any other stressful situation.[11] X Research source Go to source

  • "I really need to take my mind off of work too. Wanna go to the beach?"
  • "Ive been totally under the weather. Just really exhausted. Should we binge-watch something?"
  • "I need to get my mind off of things. Ive been thinking of volunteering at the animal shelter. Can you believe being a cat-cuddler is an actual 'job' there? Wanna try it out?"[12] X Research source Go to source

8 8 of 12:"Have you been getting enough sleep?"

Identify if theyre forgetting to sleep, exercise, or eat well. Walk through their routines and promote healthy habits to support their wellness. Ask them to try out some self-care like setting a bedtime, getting enough physical activity, and stocking up on nourishing, easy to prepare foods. You can also share that youre going to track your own wellness, too, so they can feel that youre both a team.[13] X Trustworthy Source Centers for Disease Control and Prevention Main public health institute for the US, run by the Dept. of Health and Human Services Go to source

  • "I work best with 8 hours of shut-eye. What about you?"
  • "Hey, that vlogger you love dropped a new workout routine last night. Wanna try it out?"
  • "Did you eat breakfast today? What did you have? Ive been having oatmeal every day."

9 9 of 12:"Im ordering you some food."

Offer acts of service that give them comfort during a hard time. Text that youre dropping by with a meal, calling a delivery service to drop take-out on their doorstep, or making a gift basket with their favorite snacks. Youll make sure theyre fed even when its difficult to prepare food on their own. Your message will warm their heart and theyll know that youre really invested in them.[14] X Research source Go to source

  • "Hey, Im going to whip up some spaghetti. Your favorite!"
  • "Let me order some dumplings from that place you love. They should get there in 30 minutes."
  • "Im putting together a care package for you right now. Cheese, salami, and jam! All the good stuff."

10 10 of 12:"Do you want me to come over?"

Say youre available for them and let them decide how they want to talk.[15] X Expert Source

Jessica George, MA, CHt
Certified Professional Master Life Coach Expert Interview.  11 February 2022. Go to source  Express excitement about hanging out and let them tell you how theyd like to connect. They might just want to stick to text. On other days, they might really want to watch a movie with you. Reassure them that youre okay with either phone calls or scheduling activities in person. Remain flexible with ways to stay in touch with them. You'll show that you care about their changing needs.[16] X Trustworthy Source National Health Service (UK) Public healthcare system of the UK Go to source

  • "Should I drive over or hop on a video call?"
  • "Im down to kick it with you. How do you feel about that?"
  • "I know youre going through a lot and this week is packed. Whats Thursday looking like for you?"

11 11 of 12:"I struggle with that, too."

Share your own challenges to help them to chat about mental health. Be specific about your own journey with psychological or emotional wellness. Share if you also live with anxiety or manage any other symptoms. Your openness and transparency can comfort them so they can continue to feel safe reaching out to you and others with similar experiences.[17] X Trustworthy Source National Alliance on Mental Illness Grassroots mental health-focused organization providing resources, support, and education for those affected by mental illness Go to source

  • "I actually have a lot of social anxiety. Going to parties can be really hard. I have a counselor that helps me practice feeling comfortable with them."
  • "I understand. Ive had chronic fatigue for ten years. Some days Im just so wiped out."
  • "Ive been following up with a doctor about these symptoms. Ive been learning a lot about how to find a balance and stay healthy. We can both figure this all out together."

12 12 of 12:"You dont have to fight this on your own."

Tell them that lots of people can offer empathy and care. Share all the resources out there for anyone going through challenges. Remind them that theyll benefit not just from your friendship, but also from mental health professionals and support groups. Reassure them that they have a whole community to rely on.[18] X Research source Go to source

  • "I care, and a lot of other people do, too. Have you reached out to anyone else about this?"
  • "I found 5 support groups nearby. There are a lot of other people who share these experiences. Maybe you can learn about what has helped them?"
  • "I think seeing a mental health professional is really important. What would be the easiest way for you to talk with one?"

Community Q&A

  • Question How can you see anxiety in a positive way?

Jessica George, MA, CHt Certified Professional Master Life Coach Expert Answer Remind yourself that anxiety isn't always badyou can't get rid of it, but learning to understand where it comes from and why it manifests is very important. Oftentimes, anxiety is a great messenger that can help things move into action.

You Might Also Like

How Long Should I Wait to Text My Ex Girlfriend

How Long Should I Wait to Text My Ex-Girlfriend?

How Long Does the No Contact Rule Take to Work

How Long Does the No Contact Rule Take to Work?

Make a Cheating Boyfriend Feel Bad

How toMake a Cheating Boyfriend Feel Bad

What to Do when Your Girlfriend Lied to You

What Should You Do After Your Girlfriend Lies to You?

Take Revenge on Your Enemies

How toTake Revenge on Your Enemies

Get over a Guy Who Is Using You for Sex

How toGet over a Guy Who Is Using You for Sex

Ask Someone if They Are Upset with You

How toAsk Someone if They Are Upset with You

Apologise to Your Boyfriend Through Text

How toApologise to Your Boyfriend Through Text

What to Say when Someone Flakes on You

What to Say When Someone Flakes on You: 10 Ways to Respond

Win a Fight in Under 30 Seconds

How toWin a Fight in Under 30 Seconds

Be Mean and Intimidating when Necessary

How toBe Mean and Intimidating when Necessary

Ignore People You No Longer Wish to Be Around

How toIgnore People You No Longer Wish to Be Around

Respond to False Accusations

How toRespond to False Accusations

Comfort a Depressed Friend over Text

How toComfort a Depressed Friend over Text

References

  1. https://spec.hamilton.edu/unconditional-love-and-support-approaching-mental-health-on-campus-fe1b17af0fea
  2. Jessica George, MA, CHt. Certified Professional Master Life Coach. Expert Interview. 11 February 2022.
  3. https://www.mentalhealthfirstaid.org/2017/07/quiet-power-listening/
  4. https://www.mentalhelp.net/blogs/the-importance-of-feeling-safe/
  5. Jessica George, MA, CHt. Certified Professional Master Life Coach. Expert Interview. 11 February 2022.
  6. Jessica George, MA, CHt. Certified Professional Master Life Coach. Expert Interview. 11 February 2022.
  7. https://www.racgp.org.au/afp/2012/september/problem-solving-therapy
  8. Jessica George, MA, CHt. Certified Professional Master Life Coach. Expert Interview. 11 February 2022.
  9. https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/seven_ways_to_help_someone_with_anxietyMore References (9)
  10. https://adaa.org/tips
  11. https://scientificamerican.com/article/mental-downtime/
  12. https://theconversation.com/surprising-ways-to-beat-anxiety-and-become-mentally-strong-according-to-science-77978
  13. https://www.cdc.gov/mentalhealth/stress-coping/cope-with-stress/index.html
  14. https://www.kcrw.com/news/shows/kcrw-features/depression-mental-health-service-gratitude-thanksgiving
  15. Jessica George, MA, CHt. Certified Professional Master Life Coach. Expert Interview. 11 February 2022.
  16. https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/self-help/guides-tools-and-activities/five-steps-to-mental-wellbeing/
  17. https://nami.org/blogs/nami-blog/october-2017/9-ways-to-fight-mental-health-stigma
  18. https://au.reachout.com/articles/6-ways-to-help-a-friend-with-depression

About This Article

Co-authored by: Jessica George, MA, CHt Certified Professional Master Life Coach This article was co-authored by Jessica George, MA, CHt and by wikiHow staff writer, Madeleine Flamiano. Jessica George is a Marriage and Family Therapist, Certified Professional Master Life Coach, and Co-Founder of Evolve Therapy Coaching based in Glendale, California. With more than 20 years of experience, she specializes in hybrid therapy and coaching services, couples counseling, and clinical hypnotherapy. Jessica holds a Bachelors degree from The University of California, Santa Barbara and an MA in Counseling Psychology and Talk Therapy from Ryokan College. Jessica is trained in the Imago technique and the Gottman method for couples therapy. She also earned a Professional Life-Coach Certification from The Fowler Academy and an Infinite Possibilities Relationship Certification. She is a member of the International Board of Coaches and Practitioners (IBCP).  This article has been viewed 6,472 times.   Co-authors:  4 Updated: February 18, 2022 Views:6,472 Article Rating:100% - 2 votes Categories: Managing Conflict and Difficult Interactions In other languagesDeutsch:Einen Menschen mit Ängsten per Kurznachricht beruhigen Español:reconfortar a una persona con ansiedad a través de mensajes de texto Français:réconforter une personne anxieuse par SMS Nederlands:Iemand met angsten troosten over de app Bahasa Indonesia:Menenangkan Seseorang yang Mengalami Kecemasan Melalui Pesan Singkat 日本語:不安を抱えている人をメッセージで慰める हिन्दी:टेक्स्ट मैसेज द्वारा किसी चिंतित व्यक्ति को दिलासा दें (Comfort Someone with Anxiety over Text) Português:Acalmar uma Pessoa Ansiosa por Mensagens de Texto Türkçe:Kaygılı Bir Kişiyi Mesajla Rahatlat Tiếng Việt:Nhắn tin an ủi người đang lo lắng ไทย:ส่งข้อความปลอบใจคนที่วิตกกังวล

  • Print
  • Send fan mail to authors Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 6,472 times.

Did this article help you? Yes No  Thanks for sharing feedback!  Read more articles like this one. Thanks for sharing feedback!  Read more articles like this one. We're sorry this article wasnt helpful. Here are some similar articles that might be more helpful to you. We're sorry this article wasnt helpful. Here are some similar articles that might be more helpful to you.

Video liên quan