So, youre wondering how often you should see your boyfriend
A lot of people are looking for a perfect answer, but there isnt one. There are no set rules that every relationship has to follow. Every couple needs time apart just like they need time together.
You have to decide whats best for you and your partner. That said, theres a lot to consider when figuring out how often to see each other. In this article, we will help you to arrive at a concrete answer thats perfect for you and your specific relationship.
Table of Contents
- Is more always better?
- Quality matters.
- How long have you been dating?
- 1) In the early days
- 2) After a few months of being in the relationship
- 3) Living together
- 4) Long-distance relationships
- Is there space for other people?
- Ask yourself these questions
- Do we absolutely need to see our significant other every day?
- What if my partner is away at school or work?
- Do we need to make a schedule?
- Do we need a set date that were supposed to see each other?
- Do I absolutely need to plan out our activities together?
- Do I need to make sure theyre not feeling suffocated?
- Do I have to come up with fun things to do together if we already see each other often enough?
Is more always better?
You may think that the more you see your boyfriend, the better. However, more time doesnt always mean better.
If your boyfriend is under a lot of stress and youre constantly around then it can add unnecessary pressure to his life. If hes going through something that requires him to spend a lot of time with other people, then adding yourself into the mix may make things worse!
Also, the more you see him, the more likely it is for your relationship to go stale if you arent constantly able to keep things exciting. This happens a lot in many new relationships they act like a married couple after only a few months of dating!
That being said
You should want to spend time with your boyfriend! If you like him, then why wouldnt you want to be around him? If you cant answer that question, then perhaps it is time to rethink your relationship.
Just remember: no matter how much time youre spending together, always give your partner space to breathe and grow as an individual. This is important for both of you!
It shouldnt only be about frequency, but also the quality of the time spent together. Its important to focus on how happy while you are spending time together, not how often.
Its important to have meaningful conversations, fun experiences, and an emotional connection with your partner, whether you see them once a week or every day.
You could see your boyfriend four times a week, and all seems great, but this can get tiring if you dont do anything new. Just watching TV with each other every time you meet will lead to boredom and conflict.
You should be trying to make your time together as enjoyable as possible. This includes trying out new activities, spending time outdoors, and making new memories together.
Its important that you come up with a solution that works for both of your needs, not just one person. It may take some communication but it will definitely pay off.
Keep in mind that although there are no set rules for how often you should spend time together, if it doesnt feel right, then it probably isnt!
How long have you been dating?
How often you see each other depends on how long you have been in a relationship. Naturally, those who have been in a relationship for ten years will spend more time together compared to a couple dating for just a few months.
Typically, youll see your partner more when youre in the early stages of dating. As time goes on and the relationship progresses, this will slow down until it reaches a point where both partners are comfortable with how often they meet up. In fact, youll probably live with each other at this stage!
Many of us know how easy it is to get hooked on your boyfriend and want to see him every day, and whether this can continue further into your relationship depends on your specific relationship. However, weve put together a general outline to follow if you are seeking some guidance for you and your partner.
1) In the early days
A couple of times a week is the optimal way to start and maintain your new healthy relationship. This gives both partners time to themselves and some quality time together.
This is the best way to ensure that your relationship will last!
When you are in a new relationship, theres an intense desire to be with one another every moment of the day. While this can be fun and intoxicating, its good to go at a slower pace if you want something that lasts.
Its all about learning about each other and what you both want from the relationship. Its best to be cautious and not get caught up in the whirlwind romance just yet (if you want to build something with a foundation).
2) After a few months of being in the relationship
After a few months, you should have a good idea of each others schedules and whether you can really see each other every day. If its working for both of your schedules, then there shouldnt be any problem!
Its important to remember that even though you may want the relationship to move forward faster than it currently is, rushing into things will only lead to problems in the future. It might seem like a long time now, but eventually, everything will fall into place when it feels right.
Three to five times per week is a good amount of time to see your boyfriend at this stage of the relationship. This will give both of you time with friends and family without feeling like something is lacking when it comes to your relationship.
This also allows for personal development within the relationship by creating a few days of space between each other.
3) Living together
This might sound like a given, but when living together, you should see your boyfriend every day! This is the time when both of your lives are completely intertwined. You cant be too busy to see each other any longer because then something will feel like its missing from the relationship.
Even though you share the same home, it is still advisable to have at least one day apart to see friends and family.
To stop things from going stale, its advisable to plan a weekly date night together. It doesnt have to be anything extravagant; dinner and a movie work well and ensure that you get out of the house while still enjoying some one-on-one time!
This is where most couples go wrong they slip into comfort and stop making an effort for their partner. Unfortunately, doing this sets things up for a breakup further down the line because it will feel like the spark is gone.
4) Long-distance relationships
You may be wondering how often you need to see a long-distance boyfriend. Well, it depends on how long you have been in the relationship and how often your schedules allow!
You should set up a system where you can speak to each other at least once per day even just for five minutes. You can do this before bed to tell your boyfriend about your day and how much you miss him.
If possible, aim for weekly visits every three months. The majority of people find this an ideal amount as it gives them the time to miss one another while still being able to keep the relationship alive through physical contact.
Its important that you dont feel like your boyfriend is slipping through your fingers when youre apart for so long! Couples that start spending less quality time together have more trust issues. This often leads to breakups because nobody wants to be cheated on or lead astray!
Is there space for other people?
Another important factor to consider is if your boyfriend has room for friends or even others within his life. If he doesnt have any free time outside of spending it with you, then that is an issue.
Its okay to spend some quality alone time together, but not at the expense of shutting out everyone else this can lead to unhealthy habits that create problems later on in the relationship!
What would happen if you broke up? It would be a nightmare if you had forgotten your friends for this person, only for it not to work out. This is not a nice situation to be in!
Ask yourself these questions
How often do I see or speak to my boyfriend?
Do I have time for my friends and family outside of the relationship?
Does he trust me enough not to cheat on him while were apart?
Is there space in his life for other people if this relationship doesnt work out?
Am I too busy for this person?
Do we spend enough quality time together outside of the house and do other things like going out to eat or watching a movie?
Am I disregarding my current friendships?
Is this a toxic situation?
Do I need to see him, or is it just routine?
Why am I staying in this relationship?
Are things moving too quickly, or are things going at a good pace?
Do we absolutely need to see our significant other every day?
No. You dont! And if you feel this way, something is probably going wrong in the relationship. You need a healthy balance of together time and alone time not just one or the other!
What if my partner is away at school or work?
It depends on how you feel about them being gone. Are you lonely when they arent around and constantly wanting to hang out with them, or do you think its healthy for both of your independence to have your own lives apart from one another? Having a regular schedule will help make sure neither of those things happens.
Do we need to make a schedule?
Thats completely up to you! If the idea of making a schedule feels robotic, then dont make one. However, they work well for many couples who want to build a solid foundation.
Its good to find sustainable ways for both of you as individuals to have your own lives apart from each other. Dont forget, people in relationships need some time apart in order for the relationship to stay fresh and exciting!
Do we need a set date that were supposed to see each other?
Not necessarily! But if the weekend works better for both of you, or maybe even only meeting once per week, then having a regular schedule will help make sure you have enough time to meet each other.
Do I absolutely need to plan out our activities together?
You dont have to do that either! You can just spend quality time together and make sure youre not constantly around each other all the time. However, I recommend making an effort with dates if you want a fulfilling relationship with many happy memories.
Do I need to make sure theyre not feeling suffocated?
If you feel like spending every moment possible with your significant other is the best thing for your relationship, then its important that you communicate this clearly so they know.
You should also find out how often they want to see you, too. This is because not everyone is comfortable with seeing their partner every day. Many of us need our alone time to recover and be with our thoughts.
Do I have to come up with fun things to do together if we already see each other often enough?
It might be good practice. Remember why you liked being around this person so much in the first place. Try new things or spend an entire day doing activities other than just going out to eat at nice restaurants (though those are great too).
Bonus points go to those partners who surprise their partners with fun dates they had planned all week!
Spending time apart is not always a bad thing it can be incredibly healthy for your relationship!
The most important thing is to communicate with your partner about how often you want to see them so that you can both stay healthy and happy individuals.
The amount of time you spend with each other will depend on the dynamic in your relationship and what is best for both of you!