Long distance boyfriend doesn t want to talk everyday

Download Article Explore this Article IN THIS ARTICLE 1 Send him a surprise care package. 2 Text him t

Long distance boyfriend doesn t want to talk everyday

Download Article Explore this Article IN THIS ARTICLE 1 Send him a surprise care package. 2 Text him things that remind you of him. 3 Be positive and upbeat when you two chat. 4 Support him from afar. 5 Flirt with him over text. 6 Send him a spicy selfie. 7 Try sexting or having phone sex. 8 Let him text or call you first. 9 Wait a few hours before responding to him. 10 Go out with your friends. 11 Text a photo of you doing something fun. 12 Make plans to visit each other. 13 Work toward your own goals. + Show 10 more... - Show less...  Other Sections Expert Q&A Tips and Warnings Related Articles References      Co-authored by John Keegan and Hannah Madden

Last Updated: May 28, 2022 References

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This article was co-authored by John Keegan and by wikiHow staff writer, Hannah Madden. John Keegan is a dating coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. He runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.

There are 9 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.

This article has been viewed 24,166 times.

Long distance relationships are wonderful, but sometimes it can be hard to tell if your boyfriend is missing you as much as you're missing him. If you're looking for ways to stay front and center in your boyfriend's mind, you've come to the right place! In this article, weve put together a list of techniques you can use to get your boyfriend thinking about how awesome you are and how much he misses you.

This article is based on an interview with our professional dating coach, John Keegan, founder of The Awakened Lifestyle. Check out the full interview here.

Steps

1 1 of 13:Send him a surprise care package.

Image titled Celebrate Advent Step 13

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  • Try coming up with a theme for your care package to make it easier to pack. For instance, if your boyfriend loves coffee, you could send him a cute new mug and a fancy bag of coffee beans.
  • If hes a huge sports fan, you might throw in a baseball hat, a foam finger, and some merch from his favorite team. Advertisement

2 2 of 13:Text him things that remind you of him.

Image titled Restart a Conversation with a Guy Step 4

{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/5\/5b\/Restart-a-Conversation-with-a-Guy-Step-4.jpg\/v4-460px-Restart-a-Conversation-with-a-Guy-Step-4.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/5\/5b\/Restart-a-Conversation-with-a-Guy-Step-4.jpg\/aid12795634-v4-728px-Restart-a-Conversation-with-a-Guy-Step-4.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2022 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}Getting a random text like this is sure to make him smile. If youre out and about and you stumble across something that makes you think of your boyfriend, shoot him a text to let him know. It can be someone that looks like him, something that reminds you of an inside joke you share, or simply a place that you wish he was there to experience.[2] X Expert Source

John Keegan
Dating Coach Expert Interview.  29 July 2021.

  • You could say something like, "I just walked past that park where we saw that giant dog last year. I cant believe the owner was so tiny."
  • Or, "Im heading to our favorite bakery to pick up donuts for the office. Wish you were here to grab a scone with me."

3 3 of 13:Be positive and upbeat when you two chat.

Image titled Communicate in a New Relationship Step 6

{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/c\/c7\/Communicate-in-a-New-Relationship-Step-6.jpg\/v4-460px-Communicate-in-a-New-Relationship-Step-6.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/c\/c7\/Communicate-in-a-New-Relationship-Step-6.jpg\/aid12795634-v4-728px-Communicate-in-a-New-Relationship-Step-6.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2022 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}Make talking to you something that he looks forward to. Its fine to have a bad day every now and then, but try to maintain a positive attitude for the most part. If you can turn his bad mood into a good one and make him feel great, hell miss you even more.[3] X Research source

  • Try to be positive about your relationship, too. Going long distance is tough, but if you both keep an upbeat attitude about it, it will make it much easier.Advertisement

4 4 of 13:Support him from afar.

Image titled Kiss Someone You Love Step 7

{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/0\/06\/Kiss-Someone-You-Love-Step-7-Version-4.jpg\/v4-460px-Kiss-Someone-You-Love-Step-7-Version-4.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/0\/06\/Kiss-Someone-You-Love-Step-7-Version-4.jpg\/aid12795634-v4-728px-Kiss-Someone-You-Love-Step-7-Version-4.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2022 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}If he can rely on your support, hes going to miss you a lot. Even though you cant be with him in person, you can still support him through phone calls, video chats, and text messages. Do whatever you can to let him know youre thinking about him, and encourage him to do hard or scary things.[4] X Research source

  • For instance, if you know he has a tough meeting with his boss that day, you might text him something like, "Good luck at the meeting! Youre going to crush it!"
  • If hes stuck studying for a really hard exam, you might say, "Youve been working so hard lately. I know youre gonna ace this test."

5 5 of 13:Flirt with him over text.

Image titled Restart a Conversation with a Guy Step 1

{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/3\/33\/Restart-a-Conversation-with-a-Guy-Step-1.jpg\/v4-460px-Restart-a-Conversation-with-a-Guy-Step-1.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/3\/33\/Restart-a-Conversation-with-a-Guy-Step-1.jpg\/aid12795634-v4-728px-Restart-a-Conversation-with-a-Guy-Step-1.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2022 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}You can keep your spark alive even if you cant see each other in person. If he sends you a cute selfie, tell him how handsome he looks or what you wish you could do to him. Talk about all the stuff youre going to do together once you see each other in person so he cant help but miss your presence as you text.[5] X Expert Source

John Keegan
Dating Coach Expert Interview.  29 July 2021.

  • You could say something like, "Im supposed to be working right now, but I cant stop thinking about your cute face."
  • Or, "That picture you posted earlier has got me all hot and bothered. I wish you were here right now."Advertisement

6 6 of 13:Send him a spicy selfie.

Image titled Take Erotic Photos of Yourself Step 5

{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/3\/36\/Take-Erotic-Photos-of-Yourself-Step-5.jpg\/v4-460px-Take-Erotic-Photos-of-Yourself-Step-5.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/3\/36\/Take-Erotic-Photos-of-Yourself-Step-5.jpg\/aid12795634-v4-728px-Take-Erotic-Photos-of-Yourself-Step-5.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2022 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}Get all dressed up and snap a quick pic for him to see. If youre comfortable with it, you could even send something a little more risqué, like you in lingerie. A fun, flirty selfie out of the blue is sure to get his engine revving, and hell probably be thinking about you for the rest of the day.[6] X Expert Source

John Keegan
Dating Coach Expert Interview.  29 July 2021.

  • You can also send him a selfie if youre heading out and you got all dressed up. Anything that breaks from your normal day-to-day look is a good thing to send him a pic of.

7 7 of 13:Try sexting or having phone sex.

Image titled Get in the Mood for Sex Step 8

{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/b\/b6\/Get-in-the-Mood-for-Sex-Step-8.jpg\/v4-460px-Get-in-the-Mood-for-Sex-Step-8.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/b\/b6\/Get-in-the-Mood-for-Sex-Step-8.jpg\/aid12795634-v4-728px-Get-in-the-Mood-for-Sex-Step-8.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2022 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}If youre comfortable with it, this can be a fun way to stay intimate. Since you two cant physically touch each other, keeping the sexual tension alive can be tough. However, with a few sexual text messages or a description of what youd do to each other in person, you can keep the spark going and make him miss you even more. Try to initiate this when you know hes not busy, like at the end of the day before he goes to sleep.[7] X Research source

  • Phone sex and sexting can feel a little awkward at first, but it helps to try them with someone youre totally comfortable with.Advertisement

8 8 of 13:Let him text or call you first.

Image titled Make Your Long Distance Boyfriend Miss You Step 8

{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/6\/6a\/Make-Your-Long-Distance-Boyfriend-Miss-You-Step-8.jpg\/v4-460px-Make-Your-Long-Distance-Boyfriend-Miss-You-Step-8.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/6\/6a\/Make-Your-Long-Distance-Boyfriend-Miss-You-Step-8.jpg\/aid12795634-v4-728px-Make-Your-Long-Distance-Boyfriend-Miss-You-Step-8.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2022 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}Hell probably miss not talking to you after a while. If you feel like you put more effort into contacting him, try waiting until he contacts you first. After a little while, he might start thinking about how he hasnt heard from you. Then, hell either text or call you, and youll know that youre on his mind.[8] X Research source

  • Sometimes people dont realize that theyre always the first person to reach out. If you usually initiate contact, it might be worth having a conversation with your boyfriend about it.

9 9 of 13:Wait a few hours before responding to him.

Image titled Make Your Long Distance Boyfriend Miss You Step 9

{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/6\/6f\/Make-Your-Long-Distance-Boyfriend-Miss-You-Step-9.jpg\/v4-460px-Make-Your-Long-Distance-Boyfriend-Miss-You-Step-9.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/6\/6f\/Make-Your-Long-Distance-Boyfriend-Miss-You-Step-9.jpg\/aid12795634-v4-728px-Make-Your-Long-Distance-Boyfriend-Miss-You-Step-9.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2022 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}This will keep him thinking about you until you respond. If you wait for a couple of hours to respond to a text or call, hell probably be wondering about where you are, who youre with, and what youre doing. You shouldnt ignore him for a long time (that could cause more problems than its worth), but if youre actually busy, you can let him wait for a little bit.[9] X Expert Source

Joshua Pompey
Dating Coach Expert Interview.  27 November 2019.

  • Try not to do this if you two have scheduled a phone call or video chat, though. That could make him feel like you dont care about him.Advertisement

10 10 of 13:Go out with your friends.

Image titled Make Your Long Distance Boyfriend Miss You Step 10

{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/0\/00\/Make-Your-Long-Distance-Boyfriend-Miss-You-Step-10.jpg\/v4-460px-Make-Your-Long-Distance-Boyfriend-Miss-You-Step-10.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/0\/00\/Make-Your-Long-Distance-Boyfriend-Miss-You-Step-10.jpg\/aid12795634-v4-728px-Make-Your-Long-Distance-Boyfriend-Miss-You-Step-10.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2022 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}Its important to have fun, even when hes not around. Get all gussied up and head out for a drink or to the club with your friends. Snap some photos and either send them to your boyfriend or post them on social media so he can see all the fun youre having. If he can tell that you dont rely on him 100% to have a good time, he might start missing you even more.[10] X Research source

  • If youre heading out and you dont want to text him the whole time, you could say something like, "Hey, Im going out tonight with Gina and Maggie, so I probably wont be on my phone much."

11 11 of 13:Text a photo of you doing something fun.

Image titled Make Your Long Distance Boyfriend Miss You Step 11

{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/5\/54\/Make-Your-Long-Distance-Boyfriend-Miss-You-Step-11.jpg\/v4-460px-Make-Your-Long-Distance-Boyfriend-Miss-You-Step-11.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/5\/54\/Make-Your-Long-Distance-Boyfriend-Miss-You-Step-11.jpg\/aid12795634-v4-728px-Make-Your-Long-Distance-Boyfriend-Miss-You-Step-11.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2022 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}Let him know that youre having fun when hes not around. When youre out on an adventure or grabbing a drink with friends, send him a picture of yourself so he can see what youre doing without him. You dont have to rub it in his face, but you can let him know that youre enjoying yourself even when he isnt around.[11] X Expert Source

John Keegan
Dating Coach Expert Interview.  29 July 2021.

  • You could send it along with a caption like, "Look how beautiful this hike was!" or, "Having a quick drink with friends after work "Advertisement

12 12 of 13:Make plans to visit each other.

Image titled Make Your Long Distance Boyfriend Miss You Step 12

{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/b\/b3\/Make-Your-Long-Distance-Boyfriend-Miss-You-Step-12.jpg\/v4-460px-Make-Your-Long-Distance-Boyfriend-Miss-You-Step-12.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/b\/b3\/Make-Your-Long-Distance-Boyfriend-Miss-You-Step-12.jpg\/aid12795634-v4-728px-Make-Your-Long-Distance-Boyfriend-Miss-You-Step-12.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>\u00a9 2022 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. This image is <b>not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.<br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}That way, youll both have something to look forward to. In long distance relationships, its important to visit each other as often as you can. Even if you cant see each other right now, you can plan a dream vacation or make a bucket list of activities to do when youre finally together. Looking forward toward the future is a great way to get your boyfriend to miss you when youre not around.[12] X Research source

  • If youre feeling cheeky, you could even plan a surprise visit to go and see him! You might want to tell him the day before you get in, just so he doesnt have to rearrange his whole schedule.

13 13 of 13:Work toward your own goals.

Image titled Set Meaningful Goals Step 1

{"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/6\/60\/Set-Meaningful-Goals-Step-1-Version-2.jpg\/v4-460px-Set-Meaningful-Goals-Step-1-Version-2.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/6\/60\/Set-Meaningful-Goals-Step-1-Version-2.jpg\/aid12795634-v4-728px-Set-Meaningful-Goals-Step-1-Version-2.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"<div class=\"mw-parser-output\"><p>License: <a target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow noreferrer noopener\" class=\"external text\" href=\"https:\/\/creativecommons.org\/licenses\/by-nc-sa\/3.0\/\">Creative Commons<\/a><br>\n<\/p><p><br \/>\n<\/p><\/div>"}Your boyfriend will appreciate you being your own person. While it can sometimes feel like all you should be doing is waiting for your boyfriend, there are tons of things you can do while hes away to better yourself and your life. Write out your goals and make solid, concrete steps toward achieving them. Not only will this make your boyfriend love you even more, but youll also make your own life even better.[13] X Research source

  • For instance, if you want to change career paths, you might start taking classes at your local community college.
  • If you want to get fit, you might start a workout routine or hire a personal trainer.Advertisement

Community Q&A Search Add New Question

  • Question How do I talk to my long distance boyfriend?

John Keegan
Dating Coach John Keegan is a dating coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. He runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.

John Keegan Dating Coach Expert Answer The best way to make your boyfriend love you more on a phone or video call is to give him your undivided attention. Try to really listen to what they're saying and try to empathize with them. Thanks! Yes No Not Helpful 0 Helpful 13

  • Question Why do most long distance relationships fail?

John Keegan
Dating Coach John Keegan is a dating coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. He runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.

John Keegan Dating Coach Expert Answer Problems usually arise when theres no bigger plan for the couple. You guys should discuss where your relationship is going in the future and agree that youre not always going to be long distance. Obviously, youll need to work things out in the meantime, spending some quality time apart. Thanks! Yes No Not Helpful 3 Helpful 10 Ask a Question 200 characters left Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered. Submit   Advertisement

Tips

  • If you feel like you arent getting enough attention from your boyfriend, call him on the phone and talk about it. You deserve to feel like youre wanted in your relationship. Thanks! Helpful 1 Not Helpful 0

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References

  1. https://lastingthedistance.com/long-distance-relationship-care-package-ideas/
  2. John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 29 July 2021.
  3. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BUjIXUM68KU&t=346s
  4. https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=421&v=BUjIXUM68KU&feature=youtu.be
  5. John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 29 July 2021.
  6. John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 29 July 2021.
  7. https://www.nytimes.com/2020/04/30/smarter-living/coronavirus-long-distance-relationships.html
  8. https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=265&v=PqIkB_OTvRI&feature=youtu.be
  9. Joshua Pompey. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 27 November 2019.More References (4)
  10. https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=372&v=PqIkB_OTvRI&feature=youtu.be
  11. John Keegan. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 29 July 2021.
  12. https://www.nytimes.com/2020/04/30/smarter-living/coronavirus-long-distance-relationships.html
  13. https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=177&v=BUjIXUM68KU&feature=youtu.be

About This Article

Co-authored by: John Keegan Dating Coach This article was co-authored by John Keegan and by wikiHow staff writer, Hannah Madden. John Keegan is a dating coach and motivational speaker based in New York City. He runs The Awakened Lifestyle, where he uses his expertise in dating, attraction, and social dynamics to help people find love. He teaches and holds dating workshops internationally, from Los Angeles to London and from Rio de Janeiro to Prague. His work has been featured in the New York Times, Humans of New York, and Men's Health.  This article has been viewed 24,166 times.   12 votes - 92%   Co-authors:  5 Updated: May 28, 2022 Views:24,166 Categories: Long Distance Relationships

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